Am I going to eat cheese again?

As we walked around the grocery store picking up ingredients for a new fajita recipe we were going to try, my husband and I were looking at the deli section and what I call the "fun" cheeses.

He said, "Do you want to try some and experiment with the wine we are having tonight."

I said, "No," thinking I wasn’t really in the mood for a wine and cheese night. I was really hungry for those fajitas.

He said, "Oh, that’s right. Cheese isn’t good for you."

I said, "No, not really, but it’s not like I’m never going to eat cheese again."

That really made me think. Will I ever eat that kind of cheese again? What about real ice cream? What about cake and cookies and donuts? What about ripple-style potato chips and French onion dip or Doritos or Cheetos or caramel popcorn? What about cheesy lasagna or creamy, cheesy, alfredo-y pasta or cheesy, pepperoni and olive pizza?

I have been focused so hard the last six and a half months on eating healthy and trying to make a lot of our non-healthy recipes healthy that I truly didn’t think about the fact that this is what it is…a lifestyle change. It is journey. It’s not a diet where once I get to the weight I want I stop doing what I am doing.

I don’t want to quit eating an apple and orange every day. I don’t want to stop eating two to four servings of veggies a day. I don’t want to stop teaching my son about portion sizes and that eating a plate-size portion of steak is not healthy in any sense of the word. I want my son to see me be in control of my eating and not lose control when I have a bad day. I want him to see me exercise at least four times a week.

I want my son and my husband and myself to feel good about ourselves and the choices we make. I don’t want us to feel bad if we do have that bowl of ice cream…as long as it’s once a month, not two or three times a week. I want to eat fun cheese and try it with different wines…as long as it’s once in a while, not four times a month. I want to have my cake and eat it, too…as long as it’s not the whole cake and I am the only one eating it while I am watching some sappy-ass movie because I am home alone and no one will no because I will get rid of the evidence. Been there, done that, didn’t like it. 

For right now, I am happy where I am at. Truly happy. I am happy with my eating habits and I am finally getting happy about my exercise habits. I am only about six pounds away from my goal weight. Something I never thought would have happened six months ago.

I am happy with my life. Period. Are you?

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3 thoughts on “Am I going to eat cheese again?

  1. I’m happy if there’s a 12er of 1554 in the fridge to wash down that plate-sized prime rib cut, over-buttered, sour cream laden baked potato and something sugary sweet for dessert! It’s like I’m the opposite of you. Although, I did eat a healthy portion of strawberries today…after my 5 waffle/2 fried egg (in butter) and BACON! breakfast.

    But the best is the CAPTCHA I have to enter to make this post. It says “snort trainer” as in Snort! Trainer?

    Oh, that’s funny.

    I know, I’m not healthy. Especially, when I’m going to go outside right now and suck down a Camel 99, probably with a pop.

    But hey, I don’t have to be a role model for anyone other than the next slob on a barstool. Besides, I’ll work those calories off next week. Today, it’s a pig out!

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  2. Yes, you will eat those foods again. You will teach yourself how to eat them. I am on the same journey as you…although I am not nearly as close to my goal. But I work on being happy where I am at. I have lost a significant amount of weight but it hasnt been by limiting myself. It has been by relearning how to eat. Making better choices. And working on the fact that food does not have to equal guilt. Keep it up. Your doing great!

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  3. Thanks so much for your comment ChubbyChick. You are so right. I try not to limit myself from my favorite foods because then, I tend to binge on them. I am really mastering the art of portion control. And good for you for losing a significant amount of weight. It is definitely not an easy journey, but it sure is rewarding. Thanks again for you input….it is greatly appreciated.

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